Bipolar Disorder :: Too Much Weed? Or Bipolar Or SAD?


Dec 11, 2014

I have had bipolar disorder for quite a while now. It usually gets really bad in the winter. Last year I tried to kill myself. Since then I have started smoking weed every day. I've found it helps tremendously. I haven't cut myself for a year now. However This winter I noticed that I am so tired and groggy all the time that I can barely even function. I end up sleeping through my classes, I can barely work, and when I get home all I can do is get to my room light up and play video games. I feel like I need to sleep all the time. Does this sound like it's due to the weed or is it just my bipolar acting up for the winter time. I'm an 18 year old boy who is overall healthy in the most part.

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I am 18 years old and I think I have developed an anxiety disorder from smoking weed. I had 2 small puffs of weed from when I was in my early eighteens and I got a bit high but not much at all. I was with some good friends and the effects of being high wore off. When I joined University I smoked less than half a blunt with my new friends because it was late, I couldn’t go home and it was the only thing they were doing. I had this bad anxiety attack when I was shaking, my throat was dry and I was tired. I could tell this was a bad panic attack and I felt like I was fighting for my life. I had to go to sleep to calm myself down. The next day I felt fine, I had a shower and continued with my life. A month later, I was with two of my mates and they bought a bit of weed. I had two puffs of it to regulate the amount in my mates University room and tried to remain as calm as possible to avoid a panic attack. It worked and we went to a night club. The next day I felt a bit anxious. The day after I went to my friend’s university corridor and knocked on it to let me. However, I smelt a tiny bit of weed through the door and I started to panic again. I had to lie on my bed and I missed two days of lectures. I was having fast heart palpitations, I was shaking and I couldn’t stop worrying about weed. Every time I am in a stressful moment such as getting to lectures on time makes me slightly panicky and have moments when I can feel in my head an adrenaline rush which is how the panic attacks start. I had a panic attack in one lecture while sober and I thought to myself that when I learnt my lesson not to go near weed it was too late. I have become more anti-social because I feel too anxious to be around the friends I have smoked a bit of weed with. It took 3 weeks for my panic attacks to go but my heart feels it beats a bit faster than usual. I also have this ache in my chest. I went to my GP and he said it was not due to the weed because I did very little and it was due to stress and anxiety. When I do University work and I stress a bit more my heart starts to palpitate and I don’t know how to calm myself down. Every day I have this feeling of anxiety all over my body. The weed couldn't have been laced with other drugs because my mates would have seen it was. 

I worry about hearing weed and I have this big anxiety attack when I smell it which makes me not want to do anything. Has the weed damaged my body in any way? I know quite a few people who have smoked weed and they are fine. I became sick once because I smelt weed. Will my brain ever repair itself to make me feel normal again without this big anxiety attack and chest ache? I guess too much of anything is bad for you but for me, that is not the case and I hate how I feel every day.

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