12 Days Clean Of Methadone And 7 No Oxycodone - Substance Abuse
Nov 17, 2015
Today I am 12 days clean of methadone and 7 no oxy... Today has been a real struggle I feel horrible. Today has been the worst yet. I'm exhausted my body aches I have hot and cold flashes yet I'm constantly freezing no matter what I do. Terrible headaches that last all day and night. Feeling really close to my breaking point. I hope it doesn't last too much longer I don't think I can last if it does.
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I've been addicted to oxycodone for a few years and today started on suboxone. I took my last 15mg of oxycodone and then waited until I was in withdrawal (about 8 hrs) to take the suboxone (2mg) I felt like it helped the w/d symptoms for a while, but started feeling bad again after 3 or 4 hours so I took another 1 mg sub ( half a strip). I still don't feel that great and I don't know what to do. Do I just need to take more sub or did I not wait long enough after using the last oxy for the sub to work? when will i feel better?
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I have been on oxycodone prescribed for 5 years 30 milligrams 4 times a day. I would say three years have been nothing but a struggle to not run out of my meds every month. I am going in to see my doctor on Friday to put me on a 12-hour extended-release narcotic, I have had two major back surgeries and I'm not eligible for a third one because of so much scarring around the surgical site. The last 3 days I've been taking 6 oxy's which is 180 milligrams a day. My script doesn't get refilled until the 24th and I only have 12 pills left. My question is if I wean off of 180 milligram down to 30 milligrams or 60 milligrams is this dangerous question mark my second question is if I am put on a Time release narcotic will that help the withdrawals from running out of the oxycodone. I have read so many stories on here that are identical to my story and it makes me feel better than I'm not alone but I do feel all alone and I know this is a crazy crazy drug and I didn't even know anything about pills until I had my back surgeries and now I'm one of the people that are drastically hooked. This is the first time I'll have ran out 7 days early, I've ran out 2 and 3 days before but never 7 and I'm very scared about it and I'm hoping this time release narcotic will help me. It's nice to know after reading all of these forums for years that I am not alone when it comes to this issue but at the same time I feel alone. I never ever thought I would have an addiction problem to Pills and I actually don't have an addiction problem to any other pills it's just the oxycodones, I love them more than life and I can't live without them and it's terrifying to me. So any help would be appreciate it so much.
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I need some guidance. I've always been a responsible person with a good job and good morals. A few years ago my boyfriend was using pain pills regularly. If I had a bad migraine or something he would give me one. I never thought I was in danger of addiction. I've never had an addictive personality. Well I began to use recreationally occasionally. Like take one every couple months at an event or something like that.
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Nearly two years ago my mother was diagnosed with stage 4 ovarian cancer. I was devastated. She died 3 months later and it destroyed me. Absolutely destroyed me. Being a late stage cancer patient, she had thousands of 10mg oxycodone around. I took all of her medication and began taking it regularly. I now realize it's because of the anti anxiety effects they had. I knew it was wrong and I was upset w myself but I was so caught up in grief I didn't care. I took up to 4 a day.. Sometimes 2 a day, and other than knowing it wasn't right, I really didn't think it effected my life. It gave me more energy when I couldn't even get out of bed..and it made me feel like living. A couple weeks ago I realized I was going to run out. So I had to make a decision. Find a way to get more, or quit. I chose to let them run out. I knew my boyfriend went through withdrawal when he quit so I was expecting some kind of withdrawal, but I was never prepared for this. I took the last dose Sunday (today is Wednesday). Monday I didn't feel good but I didn't think much of it.
Monday night I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned all night.. My legs felt restless and I couldn't seem to find the right temperature. I went from hot to cold in a nanosecond.
I still didn't realize this was withdrawal. I thought it was just anxiety. Tuesday was hell. I work full time so I went into work feeling like I had the flu. I assumed it was because I didn't get any sleep. I've battled w insomnia since my mom got sick so I still didn't put it together. I had no energy during and after work. I had no appetite. I got diarrhea so I thought I had a bug, having never read up on withdrawal. The thought of going from the parlor to the bathroom seemed like an impossible task. I tried to go to bed early and tossed and turned. My legs felt like they were on fire. I couldn't keep still. I had full blown chills and was drenched in sweat. I was hot and cold and sweating and miserable. I fell asleep for about 15 minutes and woke up drenched, and I mean drenched in sweat. I may have gotten another hour sleep after that. I began to realize that it was possible this could be withdrawal and made a note to check the symptoms tomorrow at work. So here is day 3. I'm miserable. I feel like I was hit by a bus and have the worst flu of my life. I looked up the symptoms and was shocked to see that I had been experiencing precisely what cold turkey withdrawal is. Over the counter sleep aids haven't helped at all.
Nobody in the world knows I was using these pills so nobody knows what I'm going through. I was debating trying Xanax to help me sleep but read up on benzodiazepines and they seem worse than opiates. Since I became addicted to pain pills, I can no longer trust myself w narcotics and don't know if I should use the Xanax to try and get sleep. I don't know how many more days of work I can take without sleep and don't have a day off coming until Sunday.
Ok so I was taking oxycodone painkillers for about 1 1/2 years for my back issues. 10 mg pills and I was only taking anywhere from 1 to 1 and a 1/2 a day. Never exceeded that. However I started getting nervous that long term probably isn't good on my stomach. So I lowered my dosage last week to 3/4 of a pill for about 5 days then I quit last Friday.
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That's where the problems started. First 40 hours I felt like I had a strange low grade current running through my arms/legs. Not painful more like annoying. Almost like I just had to twitch or move my arms. That finally wore off and now I feel absolutely terrible. NO energy, NO desire to move, headaches for 3 days straight, I just feel like rolling in a ball and dying. And to top it off I awoke last night at 2AM and couldn't fall back asleep. So my long and drawn out question is...................Is this truly all from the withdrawals? I mean I am just having a hard time believing that this stems from taking pretty much 1 lousy pill a day. I understand 1 1/2 years is a long time, but 1 pill a day?
And then of course it leads me to my next question......How long is this going to legitimately last? I have been soooo tempted to just take a pill and get the pain over with but I really need to stay off of these.
My gp has told me that i will b on meth for the rest of my life,i don't agree with him so im looking to get a second opinion on this .I was as high as 180 ml p/day ,i am now on 75ml p/day i am feeling stable but when i go lower i feel it but not as bad with the help of diazepam.i want to get down to at least 40 ml to get on the subs so i don't have to take that fairy liquid anymore.
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I would like to try and find out what addicts think will b better for them REHAB OR METHADONE. Me personally says rehab cause i am sick and tired of having to go to chemists day in and day out just to get your methadone everyday.Go to REHAB come of the opiates and then its up to yourself what you do with your life,rather than getting stuck on methadone for years.
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My boyfriend of 9 months who is an accident victim was prescribed Methadone and Opana just got out of rehab himself, but around Thanksgiving, I broke my finger and he was giving me his doses of Methadone... It's now June and I'm still on it. Only him and I know I'm on it, I refuse to tell my doctors or anyone because I'm also a Celiac and Fibromyalgia patient and I don't want to ruin my chances for getting help. I am down to taking a quarter of a tablet a day. I never really took that much to begin with. Most I took was 2 tablets a day so I wouldn't say I have it as bad as anyone else at all. I need to ween down by myself. I flushed all of his medications but I kept only three tablets that gives me 12 quarter pills to wean. I took a quarter this morning, what do you all suggest I should do with the other 11? You thing I should go with another quarter tomorrow and then cut the quarters in half by taking one of those slivers in the morning and a sliver at night? And then narrowing it down to just a sliver and then jump off? What are some supplements that have helped you? I'm allergic to anxiety medications so that's been my downfall. I am so ashamed of myself and guilty. This isn't like me at all since everyone in my family has some sort of addiction.
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I just lost my brother at the age of 21. Mixing alcohol in combination with this drug will kill you. Save your life before it's too late.
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Has anyone been on methadone for over a decade? I've been on this for 12 years and my father asked me,are you going to live like this forever? It hit me so hard cuz I never thought about it.
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During those 11 years I went up and down a lot,(highest dose was 80mgs) but managed to get myself down to 13 mgs by new years eve 2011. Then started a silly rapid detox and decreased 13 mgs down to 11 mgs for one week. Then 11 mgs down to 8.5mgs the next. I got so sick. Felt like my heart almost gave up on me giving me random chest pains. So I had to slow down. I went only 1 mg each week til I got to 5.5mgs, & stayed on that for 10 days as I felt the rapid detox was catching up to me. Today is only day one and I'm sending myself into a panic attack! I do have clonidine and Diazepam and some loperamide just in case. Has anybody out there been on methadone for over a decade and made it? Are the withdrawals longer than others who has been on it like 3 or 4 years? Will it be harder on people who've been on it too long? Is it too late?
This is my first time ever posting(or for that matter even addressing) to board about my disease. I am embarrassed to admit that for the past 10 years i have been battling a ongoing Percocet addiction. I do not know how to go about seeking help or treatment for my addiction so i've decided to join the community as a prelude to some sort of help. I really look forward to some sort of support even if just words of encouragement. Again this is my first time ever even admitting to my problem, so please bare with but do bot hesitate to offer some advice if possible. Thank you very much for taking time out if your day to read this.
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I am currently a patient at the methadone clinic. I am at 90 mg of liquid every day. Suddenly yesterday and today about 3 hours after I dose, I begin feeling sick to my stomach and I begin urinating at least 30 times an hour. What is going on? Also, is there ANYTHING I can do to stop the constant urinating? I am drinking water at this point so I don't get dehydrated and also so it cleans out the "poisoning effect."
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I'm dealing with a long life of addition I've been on 240mg of methadone for 8 years and probably have been taking Xanax for about 3 years steadily getting to higher dose ages . Is there anything worth trying short of quitting my job and going into a medically detox and probably a long term rehab.
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I am a Heroin addict of 7 years. I have been clean on and off for the past 2 Years. I have been on 50mg of Methadone Maintenance. I did not find out I was pregnant until today I am 12 weeks. In the 12 weeks I was clean 30 days then used for one night then got clean for 18 days and then I've been using hard for this past past week and a half. I am not going to pick up again. I am on methadone but I am going into rehab to detox the methadone as soon as I am in my second trimester. So I only want to know if any other women have been through this same thing. Used during first trimester and stayed clean the rest of the pregnancy. Is your child healthy? Are there any complications? Because of my use would it be smarter of me to abort because I honestly don't know the damage I have done? I will not have an addicted baby to ANYTHING! And I also don't want any complications. Please give me any advice. I am already taking prenatals, eating extremly healthy, proper hygiene, and dr check ups are scheduled. I will take care of this child the best that I can. I am just anxious to know if the damage I caused from using early in pregnancy is already done?
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This morning was day 4 of no methadone for me. My addiction issues go back several years when I was prescribed percocet for post op knee surgery. Before that I've never put any kind of drug in my system whatsoever. I had access to opiates from family members and needless to say I started taking them. It led to the destruction of my marriage and a bitter custody battle of my precious baby girl. I got clean from everything about a year ago but within the last 6 months I relapsed and have been taking the methadone from my father which kills me because he loves me so much and would do anything in the world four me. Anyway today is day 4...I slept some last night. Haven't gotten the restless legs or anything. Just extreme anxiety that things will get worse and loss of energy and bad headache. I'm just hoping tomorrow will be better. I was only taking maybe 15mg at the most the entire 6 months. The last week I was down to like 5mg. So I hope things won't be too much worse.
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I don't know what happened. I have been doing great the last 2 weeks, and then all of a sudden this morning was bad. I woke up in a panic attack. I really want to know what is going on. I am still seeing a counselor, doctor, and going to na meetings. Being over 120 days clean, would this still be some sort of PAWS. I am still struggling with how all this started while i was using. I don't really feel depressed, but this anxiety does make me feel down. Can you have anxiety this deep into withdrawal. Again, i used normal opiates for over 2 years, and switched to loperamide the last year. The lope was about 20 to 30 a day. A big part of me still thinks that after even 12000 dollars of testing, the doctors have still missed something. Is all this still normal? I mean I felt great the last 2 weeks, and then all of a sudden. Please respond anyone who has experience with this. I really think it's something else. I am scared of something not seen. I know this is a contrast from last post, but what is going on. I am trying to not take any of the xanax they gave me, but today i had to take 2 of the smallest doses.
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Emotional. I ache.
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To everyone who has given me support and advice, I have not insufflated any of my pills since Wednesday. I had planned to do my pills intranasally for the last time Tuesday, and start the withdrawal process Wednesday, but I had too many necessary errands Wednesday, so Thursday, yesterday, was my first day not insufflating my pills. I have only gotten two hours of sleep, can't think straight, am not even driving, have the chills, fever (and then my temp goes below normal), sweating, cold and hot, very loose bowels, but so far no serious nausea or vomiting. I am experiencing the burning in my neck, arms and upper back (which may be a symptom unique to me due to my history with shingles?). Though the burning may be a common withdrawal symptom, I don't know. I definitely have insomnia. I have been taking Benadryl and Tylenol PM for the cold symptoms. So far, I haven't gotten the shingles again. I did get some little blisters on the fingerprint side of my index finger, and other skin reaction on my hands, like stress--induced eczema. Stress causes skin reactions on me, like hives, etc. I know I'm a lightweight, and others may handle this better--after all I am swallowing three pills a day, I didn't go cold turkey, like others, but I know my body and knew I wouldn't be safe to even drive.
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I got a cervical steroid epidural Monday, which I thought would help, and it does help big-time with pain. However, where the steroid injections usually trigger a slight manic reaction with me (I have been diagnosed "hypomanic" and "manic depressives manic type" and "ADHD, hyperactive, impulsive type" and PTSD) this time the injection seemed to put me in a mixed state. I was really, really agitated and anxious, to the point I thought I might need to get some anti-anxiety medication. My cousin brought over a Xanax and a joint, and a bottle of vodka. For some reason, I just don't feel like adding more chemicals to my poor brain. And since I haven't wanted a cigarette since I quit insufflating pills, I slapped a nicotine patch on Thursday, and haven't smoked a cigarette either. I want to remember all of this torture so I am never tempted to insufflate another pill. All the years my pharmacy gave me the Endo tamper resistant silicone encased Opana pills I was never tempted to try the tedious procedure of preparing them for insufflation which I read about online. People actually go thru a lot of work to insufflate or even inject the tamper resistant Opanas. I read about a lung disease from doing so, and a blood disease from injecting them. And what I read horrified me. Then, within a matter of months of receiving the generic Opanas, oxymorphone pills, I started insufflating them. I was in a lot of pain, knew insufflation raised the 10% bioavailability significantly, so I did it, telling myself just this one time. I am no different than the other people trying to relieve their pain. I have to be honest with myself. I have displayed addictive behavior, and played fast and loose with my life. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that doing pills intranasally that are made to be swallowed puts one at risk for lung infection or worse. I need to be honest with myself, address my addictive behavior, and not sweep it under the denial rug (so to speak). If members of my immediate family knew, I would be in a treatment center so fast my head would spin. As VICourageous or Vic595 said: "We are only as sick as our darkest secrets" and I remember that term from AA. Also, I thank Gnarly_1 and Vic595 for pointing out I had crossed the line from dependence onto addiction when I started insufflating my pills. I am sure I would still be telling myself I am only dependent on my pills and they just crushed themselves and flew up my nose, because they could, and it helped my pain more. Yeah, love myself to death, literally.
I know I will feel worse before I feel better, but I am doing the right thing. I can't think straight enough now to quote Gnarly_1, but he said something about getting completely off pain medication to assess my real pain level, etc. and I will be re-reading that too. I know I have been rambling. My head is hurting, but this discomfort won't kill me like the path I was on. Thank all of you. God sent me to Med-Help. Maybe some day when I can think clearly I will be able to help someone else too. I will be back.
I have used hydrocodone for many years as well as abusing them. I lay in bed all night and most of the day. I plan on getting off and will be doing so with the help of my doctors. I gave my parents my medication so I wont abuse them. I just had carpal tunnel and bone fusion surgery. I was given percocets for pain. I took one and my heart rate is very fast and been so for hours. This has happened recently before when I was abusing. Why is it happening when I only take one and is there concern? When I abused the medication I also had problems with breathing, that is why I gave up control. Im not having problems breathing now but if I have pain and take another I might. What can I do?
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Ok Here's my story. I was an abuser of Percocet Oxycontin for years. Having said that I've always been able to put stuff down when it started getting out of control (like a crack pipe with money still in my wallet!) Even perks, but I would stop, then one day a week, then a couple days a week, then after work every day, then before during and after work and, oops I can't pay my bills at the end of the month. Then I would stop again, the withdrawals hurt but whatever. I finally found something I couldn't stop: the cycle not the actual drug. It was then that my now wife and I decided to get on subs, her on suboxone and me on subutex (I had severe headaches and heartburn on suboxone.) My doctor tried two different antacids to no avail. Finally he put me on just the bup, thank god. Flash forward two years 8 mg three times a day, I don't wanna be a slave to this sh++ any more. My doctor asks "are you still having cravings?" I say "yes I am still having cravings doc." But am I? I don't think so, not for perks, just for those f+++ing subs. Oh I almost forgot, and it's important to my kicking, I fell off a roof and was in a coma for 6 days. They were shooting me up with dilaudid thru a pick line that went directly to my heart. WOHW that was awesome by the by. I kicked subs under sedation, I know this because wife told me how much I was tossing and turning in a coma. So much so that they had to tie me to the bed. So it's time to go home they give me.......perks! I transitioned back to subutex seamlessly though so no problems there. So I crushed and snorted mine, which gives you a lot more bio-availability. Here's what I did: I got down to one 8mg per day FIRST. Stopped snorting mine and switched to sucking on those disgusting strips my wife gets. That was the worst I felt, going from snorting to sublingual. At the height of feeling like doggie do I snorted one to feel better then went back to the strips for like 2 days, feeling fine. Then I just stopped. Now, I have the benefit of being out of work on workers comp from my fall off the roof, which, as I said was important because I could lay around and be lazy for as long as I needed. I don't know if it was the particular way I did it but it wasn't that bad. A few hot flashes, a few chills, one night of restless legs and today I feel ok. I did use benzos to bridge any gaps and before bed (I didn't get much sleep for few nights.) I am feeling aches but I think that's just from being 37 and the subs masking them. So I got down to one, stopped snorting/went sublingual for 2 days, snorted one day, 2 more days sublingual, quit with benzos and 3-4 days on the couch. If it weren't for my back and a little ptsd from falling, which is why I'm on workers comp, I feel I could go back to work and be fine. I walked to the store yesterday, my knees hurt but I mean I think I'm over it. Good luck guys, keep telling yourself it ain't that bad, attitude is everything.
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I haven't had one Norco in over 24 hours.The last doses I was taking was 25-30 10/325 norcos a day.
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