Depression :: Feel Like Losing My Mind
Mar 24, 2015
My depression has taken a strange turn recently, whereby I am convinced that something or someone is controlling my emotions and making me say and do stuff i don't want to. I was on the phone to a friend earlier, telling her that I think this. But, as I was saying it, my insides felt really weird and angry, like whatever it is that's controlling me is giving me a sign to shut up.
I feel really angry with myself, and I feel like my mind and thoughts are all jumbled, I was just wondering if anybody has experienced anything similar, and tell me i'm not going crazy?
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I think I am losing my mind. I am a 37 year old female firefighter married to a firefighter. I have been doing this type of work for nearly 18 years. This morning, I got my 3 older kids off to school and came in and started reading the news. Long story short, I heard mayday calls from Boston's 9 alarm fire and I think I had a panic attack from there. I had problems hearing initially, everything sounded like it was far away. I was cold, chattering teeth shortly after, then I threw up. It has been a downhill spiral since. My husband thinks this is all related to a ceiling collapse I went through in November. He think PTSD is at play. But I really have never felt any anxiety over that after getting out. So I'm not sure. I don't know what to do but every minute is longer then the last and I feel fear that is making it hard to breathe. I don't know what to do.
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So it's been five consecutive days since I've been feeling like this after smoking some weed with my friend. I've lost all interest in activities and stuff and I'm feeling completely numb and without any emotions. I can't think at all unless i force myself and that night i even experienced some sort of depersonalization/derealization , it was like i wasn't me anymore and I didn't exist , It was just like i wasn't inside my body and it was so scary.Even know i can feel the consequences of it because I'm so afraid that I'm not gonna be able to function right and continue with my life.These five days I'm living in a complete nightmare and i don't know what to do anymore , please someone help me or atleast give me some hope that I'll be able to "live" again.
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I've gone nearly 2 days without a smoke but i'm literally feel like i'm losing it . Crying alot . Feel more anxious. I just want a smoke so bad. I think i'm just going to buy a packet.
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I've got another flare up on the way and it's dragging me down psychologically. I'm suffering from depression now because of it. I feel sad all the time and want to cry. I have to be honest and say that I'm having thoughts that not being alive would make things easier.
The only thing that ever works for me is antibiotic tablets but I've been told I can't be on them for the rest of my life. The last doctor I saw didn't care and prescribed me drops that never work for me.
My partner says I need to see a Dr about my depression but as there's no cure for my blepharitis I don't see the point? No matter how much counselling I could have it wouldn't change anything. I fear that I'm going to be constantly depressed.
I can't go on like this anymore. This illness is destroying me and its beat me
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Just wondering if people with depression find talking about it makes you feel worse. On Saturday my boyfriend had his worst ever day with depression. We spent most of it in hospital waiting for him to be seen. He lost his wife last year which set it off but til Saturday he had seemed fine. I told him to think about what he wants from us as in would he rather just be friends for now. This is looking more and more likely the more I think of it and the changes in what he's saying to me. This Saturday we plan to meet and talk about what he wants. I've said its going to be down to him what happens. I am going to listen to what he says but then I feel I do need to tell him how I feel. I think we probably will agree on everything like he needs to sort his depression out then think about a relationship when he's ready. I would like to talk about Saturday and be honest about how it was for me as he has said if I feel it's getting too much just tell him. I don't feel that it's getting too much at all right now but based on Saturday alone if that happened more often I honestly have no idea how I would cope. I do want to be there for him but with how he was on Saturday I don't know how much of him being like that I could deal with. That may sound selfish and I know he couldn't help it but I felt nothing I could do or say could help and after trying to cuddle him a few hours for him to blank me I was starting to give in trying.
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People say I do but the last couple days maybe a week I have been eating normally, still haven't my weight and exercising but I've been eating, but now I will go back to cutting down because I have so much...
I can't stand my weight, I hate having showers because I can see how fat I am, i once cried in the shower because of my weight,i know stupid, but it happened. I do eat but no more than 1,000 calories or just a tiny bit over and that's a bad day, I like to keep it down to under 900 but I have had a week of eating because I was so hungry but nothing more than the calories I should be eating for my age. I am very tired of always counting calories worry about food, when I have to pick my tea in the night I am there for ages trying to work out what to eat and the calories I do eat junk food but still nothing more than 1,000 calories, we barely had fruit or veg here so I do eat 'bad' foods. Food and weight is always on my mind, it's starting to affect me in school,I think if I'm gunna est in school and it's all the time. I am actually sick of it now but I can't stop, my kind tells me I'm fat but I don't no if it's a voice or me saying it to myself, I am giving up on myself because I think this is going to be my life, I don't see a future in me not worrying and fearing of gaining weight, it has taking me mentally you could say. I hate seeing really skinny people because Ino I'm not like that and it kills me, I worry about clothes fitting me if I have to try something in in front if someone. I am a 16 year old girl, 5'2 and 99pounds I've lost 10 pounds since Nov I had a week of eating and went up to 103 pounds I was just disgusted with myself.
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Well since I was about 16 I've been cracking my knuckles (nearly 10 years) although I've noticed the last couple of years it's been quite a lot more frequent.
I started when a friend of mine (at the time) used to do it all the time and I was curious as to why/how he did it and well it's been around ever since.
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I'm 17 years old, I'm absolutely going mad, my anxiety is going to make me crazy, i only think, and think and think, feeling like my mind is going to explode. Feeling that I'm living a dream, not my real life, And i'm absolutely scared of going crazy, I want to get back to normal, and be me. Since last year i started facing panic attacks and anxiety, I faced all kind of anxiety and moved on, but this kind, I can't. I've seen my doc, did everything, my buddy is absolutely fine, having my medications, that it usually helps, but nothing is getting better. Please if anyone faced this kind of things.
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I am suffering insomnia for almost a week now due to anxiety and constant worrying. It might be better if i describe my experience. Here goes: Everytime I go to sleep, it feels that my eyes refuses itself to relax even though i close it. My mind is still racing. I've always tried to calm myself before sleeping. Sometimes I managed to fall and keep myself asleep but not for a long time and sometimes it is accompanied by weird vivid dreams (sometimes it's pretty creepy), then I woke up in the middle of the night finding it hard to fall asleep again, and if I do, these dreams keep bugging me again followed by waking myself up. My sleep pattern is always like that and It's so frustrating because I always woke up feeling unrefreshed and nervous. I'm always anxious about myself falling asleep like that every night.
Do someone experience the same things that I did? As long as possible, I'm planning to deal with it the natural way. I consider taking up meds as a last resort. Is there a natural way to restore my sleep pattern? Any advice? I'm totally suffering from it. And it makes me more anxious that sleep deprivation might affect my health.
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I am at the end of my rope!!!!!! I have crps following botched surgery almost 5 years ago. I was on percocet for the first 2.5 years until a new pm doc told me it was bad for my liver and changed me to opana - 5 mg, 3 times a day with oxymorphone 5 mg times a day for breakthrough pain. About a yr and a half ago I developed horrible anxiety which has stayed with me since. The doc said maybe the new formulation didn't agree with me but made no changes. I wake up from sleep in the morning screaming and crying, so agitated. The pain docs don't care as long as your pain is under control. the doc added methadone at my last appt to curb the anxiety in the mornings but I'm to scared to take it. I've read it's more addictive than all of them. I don't function anymore, don't leave the house, cry several times a day. Has anyone experienced this? I feel insane and these docs don't seem to care. Last year I went to a psychiatrist and spent the entire year trying every anti-depressant int the book but none worked. They just raised my anxiety. I really think it's these pills.
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Is clinical depression such as in bipolar disorder ever get better on its own or does it require lifelong medications?
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I have been on Mirtazapine for 20 months. When I first started at the 15mg dose, in a month I gained a stone. Then dieted and lost it. I have never had a problem losing weight over the years by eating a healthy diet. Usually losing 2 stone in 3 months, Now on 30mg of mirtazapine, was on 45mg but had unusual highs so it got reduced. Since September 2012 I have gone from 10 stone to 14 stone 9 and I have dieted in between with not much luck. I dieted for 4 months and lost 4 pounds and I was eating so healthily and almost suffering. Due to being a victim of crime 6 weeks ago I come off the diet due to stress.I cannot control the hunger and cravings. i binge to the extreme between 10pm and 2am, I even eat in my sleep.
What worries me though is even on a diet I cannot lose the weight. And as I say, in the past I have lost weight when eating healthily no problem.
My doctor wants to start reducing my mirtazapine in January as I am on too much medication. I am worried about coming off it as I have gone through anti depressant withdrawal before, actually paroxetine withdrawal is the reason why I am on mirtazapine, Plus for my height and now weight I am obese so that is the other reason he wants to take me off it.
I just wondered if anyone has had weight gain and if they have lost it when they stopped mirtazapine?
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I am gonna loose my virginity in very few days to my boyfriend. Can somebody tell me about the changes that i will face after losing it and i have read that after loosing virginity there is a problem of period delays and breast and hips become larger than before and there is a lot of bleeding... is this true? and one more question please is it okay to lose virgin during periods ?
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I had sex for the first time a week before my period and I had heavy brown discharge the whole time and now It's my first real period day and I'm having a light period but I was on birth control for a month and a half. Should I be worried or is this normal?
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I'm so confused. I was diagnosed with depression but they diagnosed me again with major depression. What's the difference?
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I know I can't be diagnosed through this, but I'm starting to wonder. All I think about is losing weight, I restrict myself all the time- consuming between 0-500 calories, I take 3-4 laxatives a day and exercise as much as I can...
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I am 16 years old and two days ago I lost my virginity. When I got home I saw that my clitoris had swollen up, it's not very big, it's about the size of a pea maybe smaller. There's no colour change and it's only painful when I squeeze it. It just makes me feel self concious and I am scared to have sex with my boyfriend again incase it's painful or if he finds this off putting. I was just wondering if you had any idea what it was and even how I could get rid of it?
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I'm 18 years old and before a few days we tried to have sex with my boyfriend.Just when he got nearly in he noticed I was bleeding and we didn't continue further more.I started bleeding since that moments and 4 days after. After a week we were trying again but just when we was starting I began bleeding again but this time It felt like my periods and lasted 5 days.The color of the blood was just like periods but I can't go to the doctor and I'm afraid if it's something wrong with me.
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Recently, my boyfriend and i lost our virginities to each other. Last Friday to be exact. It was 30 seconds long, and he did NOT ejaculate. Then, we had sex again that following Monday. Twice actually. And he did ejaculate. BUT, each and every time he was wearing a condom. And the second time we did it Monday, he put on a new condom instead of going back in with the Semen filled condom. I was supposed to get my period Tuesday. It is now Saturday. My period is 4 days late. I told my mom, and she told me to quit fretting if i used a condom. And that it will come. However, i can't help but be TERRIFIED. Because, sex is sex. And that's how you get pregnant. I've been reading online about periods being late after your first time because it is a change to your body? Is this true? I also have been stressing a lot. Which i know can also delay your period. I am not on the pill. The only birth control we had used were the condoms.
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i'v been on the tablets for a month now and instead of losing weight i've actually gained 8lbs..im doing everything right..i mean i haven't had chocolate or takeaways or even low fat crisps for the last month
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